Everything else.. If Stranger Things Was A Sri Lankan TV Show

If Stranger Things Was A Sri Lankan TV Show

2017 Mar 7

First off, shout out to Netflix for blessing us with this gem of a show. Never once did I expect to get the perfect mix of Steven Spielberg, Stephen King and John Carpenter all rolled into one. Even though the strangest thing to happen in 2016 is sitting in the Oval Office as of right now, we can all agree that Stranger Things came in a very close, more enjoyable second.

With season 2 coming out this year, let’s see what El and the boys would face if the whole thing happened in Sri Lanka.

Parental vigilance

Let me start off by saying that there wouldn’t be a TV show in the first place, because none of the kids would be running around as they pleased without constant questioning and supervision.

Will wouldn’t have cycled back home alone the fateful night that got this strange ball rolling. His mother would have picked him up from Mike’s place, had a cup of tea and by the time the ensuing 3 hour “chat” with Mike’s mother had passed, the monster would have been long gone. Mike, Dustin and Lucas wouldn’t have been out in the woods in the middle of the night looking for Will and therefore would never have found Eleven.

Also, Nancy sneaking in Steve and then later Jonathan into her room? Hah. Not with the supersonic hearing of Lankan parents. And, El living in Mike’s basement, unnoticed by his entire family? He’d be lucky to sneak in her jacket without his parents asking too many questions.

Egg Roti > Eggo waffles

If we do anything right, it’s our amazing cuisine, and a favourite amongst many is a delicious egg roti. In our version of Stranger Things, Eleven would be obsessed with egg rotis instead of Eggo waffles. Mike (or Masith in this case :P) would hold her hand ever so sweetly in the finale and promise her all the egg rotis she could want.

Move over Demogorgon, the Yakas are here

The monster terrorising Hawkins wouldn’t be a demonic monster from Dungeons and Dragons, it would be the ever-so-feared yakas, with freakishly wide eyes and scary grimaces.  

What Dungeons and Dragons?

On the above note, there would be no D&D being played either. It would probably be carrom, cards or an epic game of sellam gedara that the kids would be playing for hours on end in Mike’s basement.

The Soundtracks

Should I Stay or Should I Go by The Clash would be replaced by Rambari, and Jonathan and Will would find solace in the instruction to eat tandoori without whining. All the songs recurring throughout the show would basically just be replaced with Sri Lankan classics such as Adara Mal Pawaneh by Jothi Pala and Mango by Anasli Malewana.

The special kind of Sri Lankan gloom


The dark and dangerous forests of Hawkins where a lot of the action takes place will be replaced by a rubber or pol wattha. Good luck hiding from the Demogorgon behind a coconut tree, Nancy.

The government’s operational methods

In their attempts to cover up their experiments, the mysterious government agency in Stranger Things has the white vans ready and waiting. In “Amuthu Dhewal”, an assembly of white clad thugs would be deployed instead, ready to spy on our cast of characters. They would find out who was with whom, what they were wearing, exactly when the events occurred and what they were talking about. El would have been caught in a matter of hours.

Corruption

Joyce would have had to bribe Chief Hopper in order to get him to start investigating Will’s disappearance. He would follow his saying of “udhe thiyenne kopi walatai, kalpana karannai” (mornings are for coffee and contemplation) with a not-so subtle hint about how times are hard and money is difficult to get by, and then trail off and look at Joyce expectantly.

Tuition classes

Mike and the gang wouldn’t need to call their science teacher to ask about the sensory deprivation tank, they’d just ask him at the tuition class where they’d all be instead, regardless of whether their best friend’s body was just found.

“Concerned” loved ones and friends

If the Lankan version of Joyce claimed that her son was not dead and was actually communicating with her through lights, she would not be left alone to grieve. People would band together to intervene and throw a thovilaya for her to get the demon that’s clearly possessing her out.

All in all, I think it’s safe to say that Stranger Things would be a vastly different show if it was Sri Lankan. In case you missed it (unlike no one missing Barb), the teaser trailer for season 2 just came out during the Super Bowl. Catch you all in the Upside Down!

 

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